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Warning: I wrote this at 3 AM the other night. I couldn’t sleep. I hope it resonates.
And when I ran the subject line by Blaire on my team, she said, “We’ll that’s universally true for me.”
—-
People don’t buy what you do first.
They buy why you care.
Then they buy how you think.
Only after that do they care about what you’re building.
Silicon Valley can be very head-y.
Numbers.
Data.
Product.
Scale.
Technology.
All of it matters. Deeply.
And is very exciting.
But it’s not where belief starts.
Belief starts when people understand why you care—and how you care to help them.
One of the most interesting things about Silicon Valley is how emotionally underdeveloped feels (at times).
That’s not a critique.
It’s an observation.
It’s also part of why I like it here.
(That, and the weather, and the raw incubation energy.)
If I were optimizing purely for familiarity, the obvious choice would’ve been New York.
Storytelling.
Creatives.
Hustle.
Fast pace.
Emotional fluency baked into the culture.
But San Francisco gives me something better.
It gives me what I lack—deep technical rigor.
And it lets me contribute what’s often missing: mobilizing people, content that strikes the heart before the head, and a bold vision for disrupting an industry that desperately needs re-imagining.
Why not have the best of all worlds?
Because that requires self-awareness.
And self-awareness requires knowing your strengths and your blind spots.
Which is what allows you to engage people not just intellectually—but emotionally.
Here’s something I’ve seen play out many times:
Money follows energy.
And energy is almost always established emotionally first.
Strategy and intellect come second.
People love to say they’re “data-driven.”
But data is downstream of decisions.
And decisions are downstream of humans.
When ~95% of human behavior is driven by subconscious and emotional forces, we have to ask a deeper question:
What creates the pull behind the decisions that generate the data in the first place?
Most of the time, the answer isn’t logic.
It’s resonance.
So if you’re thinking about how to bring your life force into the world — your work, your ideas, your company, and your voice . . .
Start with why.
Then clarify how.
And trust that the what will take care of itself.
I’m linking an article below from a conversation I had with Simon Sinek, when I had a much fuller head of hair, that explores this more deeply.
Community Resources
I listened to this great episode on 0-1 with Tyler Denk. Pretty amazing that Tyler shared the early success to Beehiiv has come down to “brute force, working harder than most, caring about the people on his platform, shipping faster” and much much more. Similar to eating your vegetables daily. Easy to say. Harder to do. Consistently.
Marisa Messana is launching a Next-Gen Leaders program designed to support rising leaders who are highly driven and motivated by their goals, yet navigating the internal pressures, adversity, and uncertainty of this rapidly changing modern world.
Drawing from decades of experience as a 4.0 Division 1 student-athlete, professional golfer, and entrepreneur, Marisa developed a Personal Operating System that empowers leaders to thrive without compromising their character or physical, mental, and relational health.
After Arjun Dhingra led a sold-out first year that left attendees laughing, crying, and experiencing real internal shifts, The Better Human Project returns for Year Two—bigger and more impactful than ever.
Last year proved what’s possible when high-performing professionals are given space for honest conversations and real stories: people didn’t just feel inspired—they left clearer, more confident, and free from beliefs that had been holding them back.
This year builds on that momentum with powerful speakers, audience panels, and immersive experiences designed to break limiting beliefs and help attendees step forward with renewed clarity and purpose.
Early Bird tickets end Friday 2/6: www.mylfgenergy.com
Also, give Arjun Dhringra a follow on IG. He’s the man.If you’re interested in why you should start a podcast, our last newsletter struck a deep chord. Give it a read, share with a friend, and properly digest!
Last Call: Come hang out with us for our next webinar on Feb 12 with Amy Norman! We are closing in on our 50
